Frank was saved, handsome, successful, available and articulate – all the things Lisa wanted in a man. As they IM’d each other online, Frank avowed instant love for her, alleging that God had "spoken" to him, and that she was to be his wife. Lisa, a loving, caring, sweetly saved sister in her mid 40’s (never married and no children), was all in. Soon, however, what started as 20-30 IM’s a day, dropped off sharply to 2-3 contacts a week, with 2 of those 3 being initiated by Lisa. Sadly, the blunt truth was that Frank was a predator wolf in sheep's clothing attempting to take advantage of a sincere sister. Lisa had previously been a victim of violent rape by a minister, and was hardly in a condition to be emotionally abused. She enlisted my counsel concerning this online lethario.

Should you or someone you know find yourself in a similar situation, follow these simple rules of the internet road to avoid head-on collisions with danger, disaster and disappointment:

1. If it sounds too good to be true – it is. If he’s all that, why is he still available? Flattery will fool you into thinking you’re “special.” Romans 16:18 says “By smooth talk and flattery they deceive the minds of naive people.” While you are special, a stranger isn’t generally going to know that at first blush, but will use it as a tool to get you to drop your guard. Proverbs 4:23 says “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”
2. Why you, out of all the hundreds/thousands of people he could chat with?  You may have the scent of vulnerability and or weakness only a predator can detect.
3. If he said God “spoke” to him, what did God say specifically? If God said it, the man should be expected to remember it.
4. What did God say to you? He works on both ends, and won’t blind side you.
5. Make no decisions until you hear from God, who confirms His will, "Every matter must be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses." 2 Corinthians 13:1.
6. Get opinions from those you trust. Proverbs 11:14 says "In the multitude of counsel there is safety. "
7. Is he open, transparent, and willing to talk about his past, failures, marriages, divorces, and/or children?
8. Don't check in your discernment - or your brains - at the door.
9. Be cautious and careful for nothing. Check EVERYTHING. If he's gonna bristle and get testy, better to see it now than later - when it may be too late.
10. If he’s not worth the price of a background check – he’s not worth it.

A minister visiting a church I attended back in the day attempted to legitimize the practice of Christians drinking by saying “In Paris, it is the custom to drink wine with every meal.” Well, let’s all move to France, right?

Scripture would appear to be split on the issue. The Apostle Paul said “If it offends my brother to eat meat, I won't eat it,” meaning if somebody else trips or is offended by my practice, I will refrain from it. Then Paul says, “I became as all men that I might win some.” On one hand scripture says “A little wine for the stomach's sake,” while on the other hand it says “Wine is a mocker, strong drink is raging, and he who's fooled by it is unwise.” Jesus was called a "wine bibber," remember?

We recently attended an event sponsored by Christians where drinks were being served. My wife has never had a drink in her life. I would never open Pandora's box  by encouraging my wife to drink just because it’s “okay” for Christians to do. Not knowing how it might affect her, I would be opening a door I might not be able to close.

As a Christian, I choose not to drink alcohol, not because of it's rightness or wrongness, but as a sacrifice of ‘close-to-the-edge’ indulgences. I believe the greater my sacrifice, the greater my reward.

Right or wrong, sinful or not, when it comes to drinking, and every other carnal pursuit, let's not reduce God to some sort of spiritual crossing guard blowing a whistle, holding up His hand for us to stop, and waving His hand for us to go. Let every man examine himself. That’s what you’re going to give an account for anyway.

Most believers see the concept of chance, as a part of their walk with God, as “iffy” and non-biblical. In most religious sectors, chance is viewed as a roll of the dice or a gamble, as in playing the lotto or going to the casino. Nothing could be further from the truth. King Solomon, the wisest man in biblical history, said in Ecclesiastes 9:11, "I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and CHANCE happeneth to them all."

Chance is an opportunistic possibility brought about by a confluence of related circumstances. Chance caused Paul Crouch to watch TBN while Bishop T.D. Jakes preached at the Azuza Conference. Jakes preached "Behind Closed Doors," while Crouch was struggling to finish his book, "I Had No Father But God." That 7-minute snippet touched Crouch, he invited Jakes to TBN - and the rest is history.

Chance caused Mahalia Jackson to let her paper boy hang around the house while she did hair. She heard him sing and invited him to join her background singers. When too hoarse to keep an engagement, she sent him in her stead. His name was James Cleveland - and the rest is history.

Chance found me standing behind Pastor Marvin Winans in an offering taken during The Clark Sisters "Bringing It Back Home" recording session. Winans said he'd been looking for me to produce a gospel radio show. I accepted, and for two years we worked together, until he birthed Detroit's Perfecting Church. He left me with this charge, "I shook the tree - you make the jelly." I turned the 2 hour radio show into a $5 million purchase and historic birth of Detroit's first 24 hour all black gospel radio station - and the rest is history.

Preparation is the due diligence one applies within a chosen field of endeavor. College, OTJ experience, vocational school, volunteerism, internships, self-directed study, serving the ministry where you worship, being faithful over menial tasks, or doing whatsoever your hands find to do become the proving ground making you ready to step into the spotlight when opportunities manifest.

Whatever your passion is, prepare, be diligent, and be ready. Then trust God to provide you with the chance to step in to your destiny.